Breathe Into Me

Beep. Beep. Beep. What’s that noise? I think groggily to myself. Beep. Beep. Beep. There it is again, what the hell is that? Groaning I open my eyes and greeted with nothing more than a bright light. “Seriously?” My voice comes out in a horse whisper. “Lovely.” I lick at my dry lips attempting to move again, but what an epic fail that was. Focusing my gaze I realized I was in an overly white room, and I mean it this room was to white for comfort. Beep. Beep. Beep. “What the hell is that?” This time my voice comes out slightly clearer and someone runs to the edge of my bed.

“Oh Kay you’re awake!” I see my mother’s frantic face above mine. “They said you would never wake up.” She lightly touched the side of my face as small crystal tears glided down her face.

“What happened?” I managed to say before my mother decided to run out the door. “Okay than, I guess not.” Once again I tried to move but became even more annoyed by the fact that I couldn’t. Actually now that I think about it I can’t feel anything. This wasn’t good; no in fact this was horrible. I tried to move my head to find it was still in the immobile stage as the rest of my body. Okay don’t panic. The thing is the more I told myself that the more I began to panic. The beeping followed right along with my heart beat until… well you guessed it until I became in this lovely state of what is it… limbo?

I crashed, and burned so to speak. Doctors and nurses rushed around me trying to start my heart once again. The thing is I really didn’t remember how I exactly ended up laying on that hard hospital mattress. I’d like to know just in case I actually did kick the bucket. The odd thing about being here in limbo is well I’m solid, but I’m not does that make sense? I can touch myself but not living breathing people. Oh how I envy those people.

My mother sat weeping in a brown leather chair across from my lifeless body. I watched as the machines breathed for me now. Was this going to be my life? Sitting here watching as my body withered away as I stood by its side? I reached down wondering if I could touch my corpse; as my hand went through my forehead flashes of memories stirred behind my eyes. Hungrily I watched hoping I could grasp hold of some mortality.

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“Come on we have seriously got to try this Kay!” Alec thrust his calloused hand towards me pulling me over the edge of the cliff. Looking down rushing water spewed from the other end of the mountain into the crystal clear ocean. The trick of cliff diving is to jump at the right moment or risk the chance of serious injury or death from hitting the sharp rocks below.  

“Remember our motto Kay.” I rolled my eyes and laughing slightly.

“Yes Alec, I do. Variety is the spice of life. Who could ever forget it babe?”  He shook his head just before leaning of and kissing the top of my head.

“See you at the bottom, I love you Kay.” It was always customary to say I love you just before jumping or doing something others would consider to be a bit to reckless for any normal human being to do.

“I love you to Alec.” I watched as he ran to the edge and jumped. Peeking over the edge I watched as he plummeted into the water in a perfect angelic like dive.  Taking in a deep breath I calmed my nerves and timed my dive. The thing is just as I was about to jump I slipped on a rock I didn’t see and twirled over the edge.

This was it; I was going to die right here right now.  I didn’t make a sound I just snapped my eyes shut as my body hit the water hard. My side and head collided with something sending sharp spasms throughout my water knocking the air out of me. I swallowed a mouth full of water just before my head broke the surface. Frantic shouts came from above and around me in the water. A faded image of Alec peered back at me as I tried to grasp hold of my consciousness. Black began to cloud my vision, and before I knew it I was out cold as ice.  

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Sighing I slumped down on the floor by my bed trying to figure out where Alec would be, and why he wasn’t there. Did something else happen that I wasn’t aware of? I know there was a lot of blood, but those waters aren’t known for a bunch of sharks either…. Or…. Oh no. I hunched over praying that it wasn’t true. It was shark season, when they started to come back into those particular areas for mating.

Cautiously I got up and made my way to where the front desk was. One of the nurses was clicking away at the mouse. Maybe it was a good thing I could go through things, because just as I walked through the desk I caught the glimpse of Alec’s name blinking on her screen. She bolted from her desk as I watched several of them run towards where his room would be.

Following in pursuit I stumbled upon a sight I didn’t want to see. Several nurses were around him and one was using this type of machine to shock him. I can’t recall the name. I caught the glimpse of something in the corner moving around in uneven circles.

“Alec?” From the waist down he was faded and once he heard his name his head popped up.

“Kay is that really you?” I rushed towards him taking his ghostly hand in mine. Sorrow was written all over his face as he took one of his hands from mine and caressed the side of my face. “Oh Kay, I can feel myself leaving. I thought… I thought you were dead.”

“But I’m not Alec! Fight this don’t leave me!” I moaned and pleaded with him, but the more I seemed to plead the faster he seemed to fade.

“I can’t Kay. It’s to late for me, but it isn’t for you. Stay alive. Stay here.” His ghostly lips pressed against mine as clear tears rolled down our cheeks. "I’ll see you on the other side Kay. I love you.” He faded within the instant and I collapsed into a moping heap on the floor.

“I can’t stay! I won’t stay! I can’t live without you!” I yelled into the ever dying air.

“Call it.” The doctor and nurses gazed up at the clock. “Seven forty-four in the morning.” They pulled the blood stained white sheet over his head.  Maybe he was right. Maybe I needed to stay and try to live my life. It hurt me, but me dying would only make things worse for everyone else.

Getting up from the floor my bare feet padded gently on the cold tile. Placing my hand just above his face I shook my head. “I love you Alec. I’ll try, but I can’t promise anything.” My body began to fade, closing my eyes I thought that I was dying till an odd tingling sensation flooded me. Opening them once again I was greeted to the same bright light and my mother’s relieved face.